Our Ideal Home Part III
Reverend Sun Myung Moon
September 11, 1983
Translator – Bo Hi Pak
I spoke twice before on this topic in June. Do you remember Parts One and Two? Taking up this subject again today, I would like to bring together all the different points we have discussed and make a conclusive sermon.
Every person will eventually ask the profound question, “Where does mankind come from?” Religious people say that God created men and women. How does God exist and where did He come from? Even though religious people may know deep in their hearts that God does exist, they cannot describe precisely and step by step how God came to be and so forth. If God can come into the grasp of man, then man could reproduce God. In other words, if God could fit within the grasp of man-if people could draw Him, see Him, and understand Him completely-then God would no longer be the kind of God we need. It is ironic but we do not need a God who can fit completely into the understanding of man. God is God because He is beyond human comprehension.
People often ask themselves, “What are the truly good and precious things in life?” First of all, they are not the things we can produce or manufacture; anything that can be easily replaced when lost cannot be really precious. We call those things which are rare “treasures.” What is a treasure? We think in terms of gold, diamonds, silver, pearls, and so forth and one characteristic of those treasures is that they have a value which is not diminished by the passage of time.
A diamond is called a precious stone. Why is that? First of all, diamonds are the hardest material of all. Also, regardless of time and space, the characteristics of the diamond do not change. Furthermore, if you take a diamond stone anywhere, whether to England or Asia, it is always a diamond with the same value. Even if you take it into tropical weather or a very cold climate, its value won’t be affected. Therefore, unchangeability is one aspect of a precious stone.
This is beyond human capacity. Even though men have tried to duplicate the diamond in artificial ways, they have not been able to do so.
Think of gold. Why is it a precious metal? First of all, the rich color of gold never rusts but maintains itself forever. Time passes, places change, yet the same golden glow continues to shine. If we were to try to evaluate gold and diamonds, which would be the most precious? Since diamonds are actually compressed carbon, they cannot be burned. Likewise, you can melt gold in a very hot furnace, but when it cools down it is still the same element.
Have you ever thought about the currencies of the world’s nations and their standards for value? They always base their currencies on gold, not diamonds. Why is that? Gold cannot be damaged by fire, rust, or cold. It is truly unchanging, therefore nations agreed upon gold as their standard for currency.
What are the characteristics of a pearl? It is made up of shell and therefore it can be tarnished or dulled, but its essence will not be changed. The beauty of a pearl is that it harmonizes with everything; it has the “color” of harmony. Do men or women like pearls the most? For that matter, who likes treasures in general? It is women. Why is that? Women exhibit changeable qualities and therefore, they like to possess things which are unchanging. When a woman looks at a diamond, she can enjoy a give and take relationship with it. The diamond is very hard and you are soft; thus the contrast is stimulating.
You enjoy draping yourselves with golden necklaces because of their simple, rich, shining color. You feel that you want to shine in that way, too. Since pure gold is soft and is therefore adaptable, you can bend it and shape it but it will not break. If a woman has a basically sharp nature, she might look at pearls and say, “I want to be harmonizing like that. I must learn from the pearl.”
Sometimes I wonder when I look at a woman who wears lots of pearls and diamonds if she really deserves to wear such precious things. The true beauty and pride of a woman is her inner self and personality, not those external things. However, many women want to take pride in their earrings and necklaces. If you could ask a diamond, “What kind of woman would you like to be worn by?” it would answer, “I want to be on a woman who is absolutely pure.” For a woman to really deserve to wear a diamond, she must preserve absolute purity. Therefore, those women who go to one man and then another do not deserve to wear diamonds. The woman who devotes herself to one man day after day, regardless of the circumstances, is the one who is deserving.
Gold is genuine; it has absolutely no falseness. Inside and out, its quality is the same. Where is a woman like that? Only a woman such as that truly deserves to wear a gold ring. Is that a correct statement? It is so crucial that a woman achieve the quality of harmony. You must be able to harmonize with your surroundings, your neighbors, and so forth. When such a woman wears pearls, it is most becoming.
When the woman wearing precious jewels actually possesses the same qualities as those jewels, she will be pursued by men, not for the sake of her external treasures but for the sake of her personality itself. That is, the woman herself is the treasure. Would you like to have your husband attracted to your diamond ring? Certainly not. Would you like your husband to love you because you wear golden necklaces and wristwatches? Would you like your husband to love just one portion of you-your eyes, for example? No, you want a man to love your whole self and appreciate the harmony of all your parts.
If you were confident of possessing the qualities of jewels, you could sit quietly on a dark mountain top and shine, just as a diamond shines at night as well as by day. Within such a woman there is an everlasting quality which never becomes boring, just like gold which never loses its glow. The person who is harmonious like a pearl can embrace her environment and be a harmonizing factor for the universe. Would such a woman remain all alone on the mountain top? That woman has greater value than any diamonds she might be wearing. Suppose that woman were sitting on a rock of solid gold. Which would be the more precious-the woman or the golden rock? Even the birds flying in the air would like to stop and be near that kind of woman.
Many years ago, I visited Iran and saw a bank in which a large chunk of precious metal and diamond was on display. People lined up from very early in the morning to simply look at that treasure. I was amazed to see how eager people were to see just a stone. What about a woman with the shining quality of diamonds? If she were sitting somewhere, how much more would she attract the interest of people, particularly men? They would want to line up for many miles just to see her. Do you think the husband of such a woman would want to go away from her? Even if he had to leave, he would tend to turn around many times to get one more look at her. It would be hard to go to work! Her beauty and love would always pull him around.
When a person has something very precious, he doesn’t want to leave it but will circle around it, looking at it and appreciating it more and more. He can never get enough of it. To parents, their loving children are like a precious diamond. The parents will just circle around the children, never wanting to go away from them. When a woman has a beloved husband, she will not want to leave but will want to be around him all the time. Likewise, a man will want to be around his beloved wife. The most precious aspect of such a relationship is that it lasts for eternity, not just a brief time. That is the kind of situation where we can use the words “forever” and “unchanging.”
We can understand from this example that whenever there is a true subject of love, the object will not want to leave but will want to be there always, turning and circling around it.
Let’s return from precious metals to the topic of God. Who is God? God is the one who is able to create gold, diamonds, pearls, and even women-all that beauty. What does God like the most? What is a diamond, gold, or pearls to God? More precious to the heart of God than those treasures is something which is alive. It is wonderful to God to think of a treasure that can follow Him when He takes a walk. Also, if a thief ever tried to grab His treasure, it would know how to dodge and jump away and still follow God. That kind of treasure would never be lost and God would know it was always following Him.
God wants a living creature whose heart has the purity of a diamond, the genuineness of gold and the harmony of pearls. That is the best object for God. Put yourself in God’s position. If you had a choice between a diamond as big as the planet earth and a living creature like we described, which would you want? If you caress a diamond, it doesn’t say anything but a living creature is different. When God touched His treasure it would respond with joy; it would laugh and appreciate everything He does. Certainly God would want a responding treasure.
What kind of response would be the best for God” Would He want to be slapped when He touched His creature? No, He would want to see a sign of love. If that living treasure came and hung on God’s neck, would He say, “Don’t touch me, you dirty thing!”? Certainly not. God would be so pleased and would hug that treasure right back. Since God created that living treasure, He put His own heart and spirit into it; so when it responds to Him, it gives Him endless, ecstatic joy.
After that living treasure hugs God’s neck, it would then want to express its joy by kissing God all over. You Americans should know about kisses. Kisses are a very important part of your culture! After embracing and kissing, you want to express even more joy through songs and dancing and throughout your daily life. You want to go deeper and deeper into your joy.
Once that kind of relationship is established, does anyone want to just say, “Bye-bye. It was fun but I’m going now.”? No, it is not natural to leave but to stay together even beyond death itself. You want to bind yourselves together; if you could Scotch-tape yourselves together, you would want to do it. You feel like being welded together.
If you had a wonderful living treasure like that, who never wanted to leave you, wouldn’t that make you feel good? We humans might feel good, but what about God? Wouldn’t He feel good, too? You don’t know, do you, how that would make God feel? Do you have any proof? Maybe if His living treasure grabbed onto God’s neck, He would feel burdened. Maybe God would want to feel free and independent. Maybe He would complain against His treasure. Do you think so?
It is easy to get bored with other people when you spend a lot of time together, doing the same things, so there must be some element which is completely stimulating and never boring. Even if God kicked His living treasure, it would not run away but would come back to Him. The living treasure who wants to stay with his master all the time will look for something to win the master’s heart. If you had that kind of “magic” substance, you could prick God’s nose with it when He is dozing and He might sneeze and wake up, but He would feel absolutely joyful. In that case, would God complain, “Ouch, Achoo!,” or wouldn’t He say, “Oh, even as I sneeze, this feels so good!” We need to find such a magic substance.
Reverend Moon’s brain was always thinking, “What is that magic substance?” He discovered that substance, finally, and it is called true love. If true love is really a magic substance, do you think it can be exchanged for gold, diamonds, or pearls? It couldn’t even be swapped for the whole universe. How about a Ph.D.? Wouldn’t you like to have that first? How about power and authority? No, you agree that true love is the most valuable thing.
Is there some sort of a true love injection somewhere? People normally do not like shots, but what about the true love injection? Any injection is bound to be painful, but to receive that magic substance wouldn’t you overcome your dislike? What about a true love thorn? Even though it would prick your finger, wouldn’t you want to touch it anyway? The person who understands the taste of true love will appreciate the sweetness of touching the true love thorn. The person who does not know true love will only feel the pain of that thorn, without the sweet taste.
What is the taste of true love-sweet, sour, bitter? Is it like a thorn or being hit by a club? Can you describe the taste of love? It contains all these components I have mentioned. Lovers can give so much pain to each other, like an injection, with just one sharp word and it penetrates to the deepest part of your heart. Then what happens? Will you run away from that pain, or will you go beyond that pain and unite with each other again? True love requires uniting beyond the pain and not going away from each other.
Sometimes a husband and wife may quarrel bitterly, to the point where they feel they want to divorce. But if they will go beyond that point of pain, they can experience a much deeper and more profound sweetness. When they pursue that deeper goal, then they really understand and taste true love. Do you understand? When you exchange harsh words, you can either go away from each other or you can re-unite.
Where is true love going to dwell? Will it be in the short-tempered person who runs away from his mate when sharp words are exchanged? No, even after you have fought for a thousand times you should search for a deeper level of understanding. That is the place where true love can dwell.
Does true love come easy, like a cheap drugstore item? No, true love is at the point which is beyond the pain of the cross. In order to reach it, you have to go to the Mount of Calvary. Let’s say true love was a person. If he were looking for his partner, where would he look? Would he look in some cheap place, such as a house of prostitution? Or would he look within the deepest, most hidden and difficult place to get to?
Let’s say true love were a person called TL. We are the members of the TLC-True Love Club. TL wants to create a large, rocky mountain as an obstacle. TL only wants to become the host to the person who can climb the thorniest, highest mountain and then knock on the back door of his house, saying, “Mr. True Love, I am here.” He would be more moved by such a person, rather than someone who loudly knocks on the front door, calling out to him to come answer.
Those who are determined to climb the thorny paths in their search for true love are usually regarded by secular society as crazy people. Who are the Moonies? We are the pioneers searching for true love. Everywhere you and Reverend Moon go, controversy arises. Are you a bunch of gangsters or bandits? I really like to see persecution come to our church because it is like the thorns along our path. Only if you are willing to pay the price and if you are determined, will you gain true love. If the road to true love were a wide highway along which anyone at all could come, then true love would have very little value. What is your destination?
Which kinds of flowers do you prefer-lilies, roses? When a person buys his lover a flower, he often gives a rose. In order to receive that flower, one has to grasp the thorny stem. In other words, you have to go beyond the thorns to receive it. Thus the rose can teach a lesson about love. It may happen that the beloved will prick her finger when she grasps the rose, to the point where she bleeds. Still she would not want to reject the flower, but would lean over and pick it up where she dropped it. Why is that? Why wouldn’t she just throw it away? Because the rose’s perfume is still there, even though it may prick your finger. Its ultimate beauty remains and that is what you like.
Man and woman come together and create a family. Do they want to live together for just a short time, say one year, or for a very long time, even forever? There are plants like the lily which bloom only one year and then die. Would you want a love like that, or wouldn’t you prefer a love like a tree which stays green and healthy, year after year? In order to reach the blossoms of a rose bush, one has to lean over a lot of thorns, insects, and so forth. There are couples who are like the lily and couples who are like the rose bush. The lily is often a symbol of religion. It grows only in one certain direction and looks like a trumpet, while the rose bush grows out in all directions, 360 degrees.
The rose has a stem, but it also spreads out as a vine. It has the ability to climb upward and also to spread out sideways. When you pick the roses and cut back the bushes, they will grow thicker the next year. Thus, you should give the roses to someone; they need to be harvested. You don’t lose anything by that, but rather your roses become more beautiful.
In the same way, love should not be directional. Religion, like the lily, is directional, but love should be universal-going out in all directions. A couple in love should not expect to have a “greenhouse” type of love. They should not want to just sit back and receive a beautiful, sweet outpouring of love from each other. Rather they should seek a rich life together, trying to serve each other, dedicated together even through suffering. “Greenhouse” love is protected from the harshness of the weather but when you are out in nature, you have to endure whatever comes along-sometimes rainstorms, hurricanes, and snow. That is what seasons and solidifies your love.
Love is amazing. Even as a slave of love, you can make a queen envious. People only say sweet words of praise to a queen, while the slave of love must suffer many difficulties selflessly. The nobler position is to be a slave of love.
This is boiling down to one simple question: what is true love? Is true love the attitude of receiving? Or isn’t it the attitude of wanting to generate love, to give it? Certainly, giving is closer to true love than receiving. The love of God is not the kind that just sits and waits to collect from others. It is a love which is sacrificial, giving for the sake of others. The person with God’s love does not want others to sacrifice for his sake but prefers to sacrifice for their sake.
The essence of God’s love is that of giving and living for the sake of mankind. Therefore, the more that kind of love is given, the more it grows and becomes strong. It never becomes weaker. The essential motion of the universe is that of circling; all living things are moving in a basically circular motion. The more you give with love, the more you increase your energy and replenish yourself. As you give love, it automatically returns to you; then you receive it and give it out again. The result is that love returns to you greater than ever. The creation of the universe was the result of this principle-of initiating the giving action, then receiving, then investing more, receiving more, and on and on. That is the way all creativity occurs.
By giving true love you can connect yourself to the universal essence and therefore you will not be diminished or destroyed. Everything exists in relationship to something else; there is no single object within the universe. All things exist in the system of subject and object; one is up, one is down; one is left and another is right. This principle is true, whether for the animal kingdom, the plants, or the minerals.
The universal principle is one of initiating action by giving of the self. According to this principle, all beings must become harmonized with something greater than themselves. The universal principle is a giving, harmonizing and creating principle. Thus the more you give, the more harmony is produced, and the more goodness is created.
Goodness is characterized in this way: that you live for the sake of others. This is what I have been preaching over and over again. That is what we mean when we say that the individual should live for the sake of the family, the family for the society, the society for the nation, and the nation for the world.
What is a good husband? He is one who lives for the sake of his wife, and the good wife lives for the sake of her husband. What is a good couple? Those who are living for the sake of their family, their children. Good citizens are those who live for the sake of their country; good leaders live for the sake of the people. What is a saint? He is a person who lives totally for the sake of mankind, beyond the boundary of any nation. Who is God? One definition of God is that He is the Being who lives for the sake of the universe, rather than Himself. Therefore, all things must need God. Is that true or not?
The critics of the Unification Church may tell you, “Reverend Moon has made up a very persuasive theory, but it has no foundation. He is just trying to hook you. He wants to make all you young people suffer. What kind of principle is that, living for the sake of others?” Wherever we go, we are looked at scornfully and persecuted. Why do we have to live such a peculiar way of life? When you do something for the sake of others, ultimately others will do the same for you. Thus when you move in a complete circle for the sake of America, eventually the entire country will join in that effort.
Reverend Moon is following this principle exactly. I have been doing things for the sake of America, even though Americans seem to be misunderstanding and persecuting me. Eventually, however, this internal giving will become external. Within twelve years of my arrival here, America will be in the position to understand and welcome me. 1973 was the first of the twelve years; so we have only three more years to complete.
At this time in 1983, the dawn has begun. No matter how dark the night, the dawn heralds to the world that the sun is rising and once it does, all darkness vanishes. Reverend Moon has been turning and giving light in the darkness, just as the moon gives light in the night. When the morning comes the moon is replaced by the sun. which gives the light. Although my name is Sun Moon, according to the dispensation the order is Moon-Sun. The restoration course is one of reversed procedures.
You are heading for true love. Will you try to enter by the front door or by the back? Those who proclaim themselves proudly, saying, “I did it myself. Look at me!” are the front-door people. But the person who just quietly and humbly feels that he is not deserving, that he has not done enough, is the one who goes to the back door. And God will be there, urging such a person to come in. God will receive the people coming in the front door with His left hand, but He will receive the back door people with His right hand.
Even the Unification Church has people on the left hand and on the right hand side. Those who always want to receive the glory, credit and recognition will be received by me with my left hand. But those who always want to give more, are humble and unassuming and meek, are received by me with my right hand. Which would you rather be? Therefore, you must never try to take the easiest way. You must voluntarily take on the toughest course.
It is easy to answer correctly with your mouth but doing it with your deeds is not easy at all. I have honestly studied for ways I could make you suffer more. On the surface that seems very cruel but I know that the winners of this course will receive the gigantic prize of true love.
When I selected True Mother in 1960, the same principle was applied. There were a lot of candidates, ostentatiously demonstrating themselves and their beauty and worth-wearing lots of makeup and so forth-but I completely ignored such women. I was looking at the women who humbly came in the “back door,” who wore no makeup but always tried to serve others and never even considered themselves as candidates for the True Mother. The true candidates were those who made up their minds to be the last ones in the Unification Church to receive any sort of glory.
Normally one would describe the tail of a snake as the farthest point from its head, but that is not so. The closest part to the head of a snake is its tail because of the way its body coils around. Thus the eyes see the tail first. Likewise in relationships, the head should always make a relationship with the tail and thus make a loop. The “tail position” is not worthless at all; quite the contrary. Within a family with many children, it is normal that the youngest child will receive the most attention from the parents. Even a king of a great country will want to pay attention to the little children, who are like the “tails” of the country. As the king loves and cares for the smallest child, he is already loving everyone in between. When he loves the least, he loves them all.
I have been practicing this way of life. I do not usually pray for the best people in America but for people who are suffering the most in the world, such as those in communist concentration camps. I also pray for the most suffering members of the Unification Church. In that way, I am praying for all of humanity.
I just returned from the World Media Conference in Colombia. Rather than meeting with the President or heads of state there, I preferred to see our unassuming and poor members and encourage them. I am constantly teaching our national leaders that instead of seeking to reach only the top people in government and such, it is far more important to go to the far corners of the nation and meet with the most humble, suffering members. They should shed tears with them, pray for them, take out their own money and buy little things for them. That is more precious. By doing that, a leader is setting the condition of loving everyone in between the top and bottom.
Before I came to stay in America, I showed my love for the things of creation by establishing the holy grounds in every state. I wanted to love this land and its terrain more than anyone else in its history. Thus I rode in a car, day in and day out at top speed, traveling to every corner of the country and stepping on the land there. I ended up way down south in Key West, Florida, arriving at 3 o’clock in the morning. There were two drivers taking turns in our Plymouth station wagon and they were constantly dozing off; that was very dangerous. I never dozed because I felt almost like I was meeting my new bride. How could I not stay awake to love this land?
I certainly visited with people at the top levels of this country, from the President on down, but I was more interested in visiting the humble and poor people. All my actions were motivated by this principle of meeting the highest and the lowest. Reverend Moon would like to be in the tail position in our movement. Wherever I go, I want to do the worst and most difficult things, the things which all the other members hate to do. That is my precise position today. By this principle, the Unification Church will have to prosper; there is no other way.
There are businessmen who are able to amass fortunes from the humblest beginnings. Such people feel that no matter how much money they make, even one penny is precious. That is the way for a businessman to be successful. By the same token, when you work hard with the same attitude, valuing every penny you earn and spending it for the sake of God and humanity, it is forever protected and no one can take the value of it away from you. But those people who work hard to make money only for their own selfish purposes will not earn anything of lasting value.
It is important to know how to earn money, but it is even more important to know the proper way to spend it. Col. Pak, for example, is in charge of a large budget for his many big projects. I am always watching to see what kind of attitude he has and how he spends that money. The Media Conference uses a lot of money, so I was watching to see how they managed it. There were many imperfections. The Media Conference is important, but it should always be done for the sake of the largest purpose. When something is dedicated for the purpose of humanity and the entire world, money will want to come joyfully for that.
Whether you live by this principle or not, it will continue to prevail throughout history. History is waiting to see the true subject who will successfully practice this principle. Reverend Moon has learned this truth. This was my first visit to Colombia, but the people were very open and receptive to me. Even the government people went to great lengths to provide for my protection. Everywhere I went, they were trying to help me.
Why did they want to do that? They felt that Reverend Moon’s visit was an extraordinary opportunity and they didn’t want anything to happen to mar it. They wanted Reverend Moon to enjoy his visit and leave with a feeling of happiness. They knew that if anything bad happened to me, it would bring bad consequences to their country. What about you? Do you want to protect me? Why do you feel that way?
In order for mankind to be linked to true love, someone has to stand in the position of mediator. I am in the position to link everyone to that ultimate goal, so that is a most precious position. For a woman, her husband is her mediator for true love. For the true family love, the children are the mediators, as well as the parents. There are always vertical as well as horizontal channels for love.
Where does God exist? He does not exist within the limited scope of our understanding but in a position beyond. That position of “beyond” is not somewhere dark and unreal; it is under law and principle.
The Unification symbol is divided into two parts; so is the Korean flag. Likewise, the nation of Korea is divided into two parts. This division is one of confrontation and collision but division does not necessarily have to be negative. When there are two beings, there can be a beautiful harmony of give and take when they move together. The Unification movement is trying to convert the confrontation position into the position of give and take. America is a realm of confrontation and rejection, but I would like to make it a place of smoothness and harmony.
Wherever there is confrontation, I seek to bring about harmony and reconciliation. The rear must come to the front and the front goes to the rear. By their swapping positions, harmony can be created. Satan should have followed men but instead tried to control man from the front position. God’s way is never to force someone to do something, because such a thing will not last. God always subjugates by natural means. He wants to be followed voluntarily, without any coercion. That is why God always uses persuasion, rather than force and that is why God’s will has taken such a long time to be accomplished in history.
If someone looks at you with sharp, hostile eyes, you must defuse his hostility. Likewise when someone speaks strong, hateful words to you, instead of forcing him to stop, you must simply mellow his heart so that he will automatically surrender.
In this day and age, there is one man proclaiming the core truth of the universe-that is Reverend Sun Myung Moon. The proclamation is very simple: you are born for the sake of others; you must live for the sake of others and even die for the sake of others. It is a very simple but very profound message arising from the universal principle.
The way of life of parents is to live for the sake of their children. The way of life of a king is to live for the sake of his people. The way of life of the people is to live for the sake of the king. God exists for the sake of the universe and the universe was created and exists for the sake of God. I am preaching to you today of true love, a way of life for the sake of others.
If anyone here has an objection to this principle, please raise your hands and tell me. Do you hesitate to raise your hands only because you are afraid? Then, you accept this teaching as the truth? Does accepting it make you feel good or bad? Even if you feel bad about it, the universe is saying, “How wonderful!” and God is saying, “Yes, my son, that is my truth!” You don’t have much choice in that case. Living for the sake of others even unto your life has to be the right way. There is no way around it.
Those who live with true love here on earth will go through the automatic doors of the Kingdom of Heaven- you won’t even have to touch them but they will open wide for you. When you walk through those automatic doors, will God shout, “Who opened those doors without my permission?” No, God will just jump out joyfully and greet you, “Welcome, my child! I have been looking for you.”
Do you know why God gave you a spouse? He wants you to have someone as your object, for whom you can practice living for the sake of others. The privilege of a wife is to be the special object for one man so that he can practice God’s way of life through you. The men and women who practice this principle are the happy ones. You are happy because eternity is with you. The entire universe can have give and take with you. However, if both of you are primarily looking to receive from the other, that will create a confrontation relationship and you will be stopped and destroyed. The everlasting relationships are those of giving and receiving, while confrontation relationships will always end in destruction.
It is not good for a woman to think, “Now that I am married, I can receive love from someone.” You should get married in order to have someone you can love, someone to whom you can give your tenderness and warmth. As a soft, fragile woman, your desire should be to give yourself for the sake of your husband. The tough, muscular man pursues a soft, tender woman as his object to serve for the sake of others.
There is a warm and a cold current in the ocean. The fish who live in the warm current can only multiply in cold water and the cold water fish can only multiply in warm water. That is a precious means of give and take. Thus man pursues woman and woman pursues man. True love requires living for the sake of others on every level- spouse, parents, and grandparents. This is the most noble and sacred duty of human beings. If someone within a family exhibits truly selfless love, he will win the hearts of the rest of the family and all the blessings of that family will flow to him.
Self-centered love produces no growth, only destruction. An example is when a husband never looks to serve his wife but thinks she exists just to serve him. No matter what, those who give selfless love will win the hearts of anyone else. Even the most cold and hard-hearted woman will be won by a husband with selfless love. If you follow God’s principle and live His way of life, God’s love will definitely come knocking on your door.
It is often the case that people who are searching for love are only searching for a good time; then whenever difficulty comes, their love is weakened. But those who engage in love from a selfless attitude, enduring the worst possible situations, will never lose that love. When you only love someone during the most favorable conditions, any difficulties will weaken your love. When you start your truly pure, selfless love from the worst possible condition, the only thing you need to expect is improvement. Wouldn’t you prefer the second situation?
When you are first married, would you like to be in a position of envy to everyone? Or wouldn’t you prefer to be in a position in which others are skeptical of you? Who in the world looks favorably upon a mass wedding? Most people think it is quite strange. Why did Reverend Moon use such a method? Instead of urging you to meet each other freely and search for the mate you liked, I matched you. Why? The Unification marriages truly represent marrying for the sake of others. You marry for God, humanity, for the sake of America, Africa-since white and black people marry. Your marriage is not controlled by you but by God; thus in a most fundamental way, your marriage is by and for the sake of others. Once you accept the marriage from me, you are trying to live for the sake of others. What a dramatic way of life, No words are needed; your noble deeds are good enough.
On Adam and Eve’s wedding day, what sort of choice did they have? Could they think, “I don’t like him/her,”? The animal world is the realm of pure principle. When male and female animals meet they don’t talk things over or question each other and make contracts. When male meets female, they simply mate-and they mate for the sake of each other, without any thought. The female doesn’t say arrogantly, “You males come to me the way I like!” When they are ready for conception, they don’t have any hesitation. The female sends out a signal to the male, who quickly gets the message and gives back his corresponding signal. Then they begin circling around each other.
Male and female are two separate beings but they are truly one. Thus they long for and seek each other for the purpose of unity. The movement for “gay rights” shows the current confusion of society. If such a culture were approved by God, all of humanity could be extinguished within one century! That is Satan’s ultimate challenge to God. It is like him saying, “I am going to wipe out the human race.” While America has been going toward that perverted direction of “gay liberation,” and so forth, the Unification Church has been going in the opposite direction-that is the mass weddings for the establishment of ideal men and women. We marry for the sake of God, the future of humanity, and the sake of the country, as well as the sake of the children. Without that kind of principle, there can never be such a thing as eternal happiness.
What kind of people are gathered now in this room- good or evil? What are the characteristics of good people as opposed to evil people? Individualism belongs to Satan, not God. Because of the increasingly individualistic attitude among Americans, it is more on the evil side. That is why America is declining. Individualism must be changed to the way of life that benefits the whole. A self-centered society always fosters criminal activities such as robbery, murder, and drug-dealing. This is because the common ethic is that anything which benefits the individual is good. But when you are living for the sake of others, you will gain true prosperity, happiness and beauty in your life. Does anyone here have an objection to that?
Those who work very hard and gain Ph.D.s at prestigious universities are most often doing that for their own individual benefit. However if you study for the sake of the country, for humanity, and for the sake of God, you will gain everlasting benefit. This country needs such people; this world needs such people. Don’t you think so? What about God, does He need such people? You should eat, breathe, and sleep for the sake of others. This must not be just in your thinking; rather, every cell of your body should feel and live this principle. It should be automatic and done without even thinking. This is the mission of the Unification Church-to mold such men and women who can live for the sake of others automatically.
The words “man” or “woman” mean half of the whole. Therefore, you must not consider simply “my” determination, “my” desire, etc. When you speak of “I,” you are only 50% of the whole, whether a man or woman. Each woman was born for the sake of others, not for the sake of herself. Why did God give you large breasts? If it were just for yourself, it would be too burdensome but it was for the sake of your babies. Likewise, you don’t need wide hips for your own sake but for the ability to bear children. Your own sexual organs were created to receive from someone else, not for your individual purpose. The entire design of your body eloquently testifies to the fact that you were made for the sake of others. Is this wrong or right?
Why does a man have broad shoulders? He is like the lion who must go out and defend others-not himself, but his family. When men and women come together, their proportions create a solid square. The woman has narrow shoulders because she is supposed to be embraced within the man’s arms. It would have been too difficult for your husband to take you in his arms if you were very broad shouldered! The physical attributes of man and woman make perfect harmony when they lie in bed together. If they both had wide hips, they wouldn’t be comfortable!
A man has a larger nose than a woman but that creates a balance. Women usually laugh in a downward direction, while a man will guffaw loudly in an upward direction. A man without a woman lives in a lonely world, and vice-versa. Do you women want to live alone, wearing your makeup and looking at yourselves in the mirror?
This principle is applicable all the way up to the level of our Creator. What does the Creator like to see most of all? TL for LT-True Love for a Long Time. God created human beings for the fulfillment of the highest ideal of true love. Within God there is both masculinity and femininity so He would come to visit a man with a woman as His medium. Likewise, He would come to a woman through a man. Why is this a good thing? Because the man and woman can love each other and create the spark of love.
Living for the sake of others is the only way the ultimate harmony between man and woman can be achieved.
As you try to serve each other, you confront in a way by trying to give more than the other. Thus as you both push toward the center, your energy becomes totally rounded. That is where the true couple comes into being. This is how you can occupy the world of up, down, right and left. Upper represents God, lower represents earth. Right represents men, left represents women. In order for men and women to truly unite in true love, they must meet with Heaven and earth; that is, they must achieve vertical unity. Without finding God, there is no way true love can be fulfilled.
Thus, within the center of creation exists the Tree of Life-men and women. When you read the book of Revelation, it says that the Tree of Life will emerge which will go on forever. With true love in the center, men and women as the Tree of Life will harmonize on the universal scale and will ultimately reach the heart of God.
You men need to achieve strict vertical discipline. When God comes first in your love, you do not lose any love between each other. This is because you are creating more capacity within yourselves for love and can love each other more. Those couples who love their children more than themselves allow God to truly be with them. True men and women are those who love humanity, each other, their children, as much as they love God-that is, they are loving Heaven and earth. The Unification Church installed this as the Heavenly four-position foundation.
As men and women come together in the give and take of love, expanding themselves to greater and greater capacity of love, they eventually become universal men and women. The ideal world is one in which people love the world as much as they love God, their spouses, and their own children. That must be the reality.
What is the ideal man? He is the man who commits every ounce of his energy for the sake of true love. For example, he uses his eyes for the sake of true love to the maximum degree. Even for all eternity, his eyes will never get tired of looking at his beloved ones; an eye with that kind of energy is a true eye.
The true man’s ears never get tired of hearing the sounds of his loved ones. Likewise, his nose is utilized for the maximum capacity of expressing love. His mouth would do the same; he would kiss his loved one everywhere. Suppose there was a man who kissed so much his mouth got completely chapped and his lips were bleeding, but still he would want to kiss his loved one! The sense of touch of a true man is able to experience true love constantly in every cell and never get tired. Such is the stimulation of true love!
The true husband and wife can love that much. You must maintain some thread of connection with each other, even though you cannot be together all the time. Perhaps you might keep one hair from your spouse’s head in your wallet during the day. At night, you might wrap it around your finger, just so you can feel the presence of your beloved one. Is there anyone here who thinks that is just too much love?
The person who is intoxicated by love is like a boneless person, melted down, but still he wants to experience more and more love. There is no word and no expression for the fullness of true love. There are paintings of beautiful naked women in art museums and whenever you men see such things, you can relate that beauty with your own wife. A man with that attitude will never fall or go wrong. He should also think, “That is just a painting; my wife is alive, warm, and responsive to me. My wife is a million times better.” If you have such an attitude, it is all right to look at such paintings. The wife of such a husband will be a happy one.
Likewise, when a woman links every experience she has with her husband she will have a very happy husband. When your hair gets gray, look at it as the result of giving out all your energy in love. How wonderful it is, then, to have gray hair! It doesn’t matter what kind of clothing you wear; with true love, your value is not diminished by such things. Perhaps your wife is pale and sick sometimes; certainly she may not be a beauty queen, but if you are giving your entire heart and soul to protect and uplift her, it won’t matter.
As a matter of fact, I told Mother last night, “I love you so much, I don’t want you to depart from me for even a minute. Perhaps I will tie a rope to your leg so that even when you go to the bathroom, I will know where you are.” Certainly there is not a pleasant perfume in the bathroom, but that isn’t important. What is important is if love is there. When I said that to Mother, she liked it very much. I told her, “Even when I must sleep apart from you I want to have a piece of your hair under my pillow.” We made a resolution to practice that kind of love.
The husband and wife who are always united, regardless of comfort, health, whether happy or sad, are the beautiful couple. Mother doesn’t enjoy boat riding very much because she gets seasick very easily. I spend a lot of time out on the ocean and Mother always wants to go with me, even though she gets sick. She thinks, “I just want to stay with Father.” That is truly beautiful.
The ideal family begins from the ideal husband and wife. You are the personification of true love so every cell in your body, from the soles of your foot to the top of your head, must express your love to your loved one. It is the process of nature for lower forms of creation to be used by the higher. For example, plants are eaten by animals and animals are eaten by man. This is not a cruel thing because those other forms of creation were meant to be absorbed into the higher expression of love. It is men and women who must give the highest expression of love because they are the beings who are ultimately fulfilled by God. Thus the plants and animals can go with them into God’s love.
The journey of all creation is a journey toward God. The mineral kingdom lends itself to the plant kingdom, which is one step closer to God. The plant kingdom gives itself to be eaten by animals, which takes them one step closer. The animals give themselves to the service of men and women, and in that way come to the love of God. Thus mankind represents the entire universe when they join together with God. There have been many interpretations of this phenomenon, such as the law of the survival of the fittest, and the stronger eating the weaker, and so forth. But from the principled point of view, there is a clear purpose to why these things happen.
If you give yourself for the sake of the True Father, do you lose anything? No, you are consummating yourself by joining a higher realm of love for God. Thus your sacrifice is never in vain but is fulfilled. God gives True Father incredible difficulties-is that because God hates me? No, God wants me to experience and personify His love more. Therefore, I can have no complaint; everything is OK because of that.
The entire world is linked by the four directions-up, down, left and right. Men and women, and mind and body all have four directions. When husband and wife truly love each other in a sacrificial way, they become the center of the society, nation, world and universe. Likewise, any nation which embodies such a spirit will become the central nation of the entire world.
You need parents, representing the upper direction, and you need your posterity, representing the lower. You need your own generation, as well, representing left and right. Heaven and earth must be linked to all of these. Without the relationship of all these components, there is no way you can be linked with the universe. The teaching of the Unification Church is for the individual to live for the sake of the family and in that way you become the center of the entire circle. When the family lives for the sake of its tribe, it becomes the center of that tribe. When that tribe lives for the sake of its society, it becomes the center of that society. This is the way in which the principle is expanded to all levels.
Just as the minerals, plants, and animals are absorbed by human beings, the individual is absorbed by the family, the family by the tribe, the tribe by the society, and so on. By giving oneself sacrificially you are absorbed into higher and higher levels of accomplishment and ultimately you can enter into the heart of God. Don’t you agree?
Sometimes you might complain, “That sounds like a good theory, but it won’t work. Our society is not structured that way. Individualism is still very important.” What do you need the most-a democratic world or a world of love? On the journey and search for true love, do you need your individualism or your accomplishment of love? You need love even more than yourself! Would you prefer the realm of love or the realm of freedom? Reverend Moon has come up with the statement that the world will not survive or be meaningful without the fulfillment of love. That is why we never hesitate in the face of persecution. We must move forward, advancing this principle until we are victorious and prosperous in this way of life.
At the same time, the entire universe is coming toward the center point and the center is moving outward. There are two powers-centrifugal and centripetal-pulling and pushing, which must harmonize to create the circling motion. Through these two powers, what would be the ultimate essence of energy that would bring them into the center, permanently installed there? The power of true love will bring the ultimate anchor and foundation.
There is nothing under the sun that disregards or hates love. Even a piece of grass, a tree, animals, insects -every bit of God’s creation is thirsty for love. According to the ideal, if the master of a garden really loves his trees and plants, the insects will stay away and will not harm those plants. If the insects come there, they would just rest or play; they would not want to harm the plants because the power of love would protect them. Look at the universe from this standpoint–the shining sun, moon, the sparkling stars, the breezes, all the things of nature are whispering of universal love. Everything is singing for love. Everything is a love ornament for the center of this universe. God created those love ornaments for the stimulation of the God-centered husband and wife.
It is common to refer to the things of nature when speaking about love. When you describe the eyes of your loved one, you might say, “They shine like an innocent dove.” Or someone might say, “That couple is dancing around like a butterfly.” The butterfly actually has a very irregular motion, seemingly without any system, but looked at from the eyes of love, it is beautiful-it is like dancing.
You should live your life on earth with ecstatic love and then you should enter into Heaven. God will welcome you saying, “You are the fulfillment and personification of my love!” Then you will praise God, saying, “My God, you are the center of my love. You have given me so much love!” True love is a great power.
God is not a subject of fear; He is the subject of loving intimacy and He wants to touch you everywhere. That is why there were no clothes needed in the Garden of Eden-they make the expression of love more clumsy! Suppose His son or daughter bit God’s hands. Do you think God would get mad? No, He would be pleased at such a love bite. The husband who really loves his wife might sometimes get carried away and just bite her! She could look at that red mark every day and say, “This is my medal of honor which my husband gave me!” That is better than a gold ring!
The ideal family is like a feast ready for God all the time. I want to make God laugh the greatest laughter of all in history. I want Him to be so filled with laughter that He gets a belly-ache! Think of it-God responds so intensely to your love that you can penetrate His very heart like a missile. He would never complain against such powerful love, even if you bruised His chest! Because you made such an intense impact upon God’s chest, He would need a special ointment to heal that place. Even God hasn’t planned such an ointment yet, because the impact of man’s love hasn’t been so powerful. So God will tell you, “Because of your love, I had to create this new love ointment.”
If you create marks of love all over God’s body so that He is sore all over, will He want to cover up those marks? No, not at all. He will be proud of them, like medals of honor. There must be something which we can do, something which history has never seen.
Men and women feel so intensely toward each other in their love and I want you to understand that God is just the same. When you are really enjoying the ecstasy of romantic love, God is enjoying that love, too. God will be holding one hand of the husband and one of the wife, saying, “You two are mine forever. I will never release you. You are the prisoners of My love.” What would you say to that? Certainly you would be happy to be God’s prisoners. Wouldn’t you shout out in grateful joy? The ultimate expression of joy is tears. All the tears of the present world are merely a dress rehearsal for the future. We are sweating and shedding tears now for the sake of that ultimate expression of joy. How wonderful that is!
in that precious love, there is no comparison with diamonds, gold, or pearls. Your five senses should be wide open to perceive the love of God. When that love completely overwhelms you, imagine such a position! You will become totally intoxicated, like a wonderful dream. What a peace within you-quiet, genuine and ecstatic peace. It is only in the world of principle that that is possible. But in the world in which the self is the center, that can never be possible.
Therefore, the road of true love is the most precious. If that road happened to be the road of slavery, I would not mind going that road. The true American dream shall be found on that road. If the road of democracy takes me away from the road of true love, then I will run from democracy. Even if all of America comes against us, it will not change anything. The way of life we are pursuing is so extraordinary, I would not swap it for anything. This is the road of Reverend Moon. Even if 240 million American people come and spit at me, I shall still prepare my offering to God, restoring peace.
This is dramatic and romantic, but it is the true model and ideal. If even the animal world has an instinct to sacrifice for the sake of love and offspring, how much more does the human world? Ironically, the human world has become so self-centered, it is often blind to the beauty and purity that exists in the animal world. Therefore, Reverend Moon has come to this country and this world, determined to inspire a new breed of people dedicated to the true way of life, centered upon true love.
Man must restore his original, fundamental way of life no matter how difficult it may be. Unless we achieve the original human nature, there shall be no lasting peace. Do you follow? Those who are married, please raise your hands. You husbands and wives must give your total devotion to the fulfillment of this love. It is not the appearance of your face or the color of your skin that determines the size of your love. There are beautiful birds, such as the raven, which are black; they are that much more beautiful because they are black, not any less beautiful.
The unity of husband and wife is the basic building block of Heaven. You must make your foundation on that level. Then you can be linked with the entire universe, all the way up to the bosom of God. We love our children because they are the manifestation of the love between husband and wife. We can give our very lives for those children; that is the beauty and the duty of the parents. When you fulfill your duty towards your children and your fellow man, then God will fulfill His duty towards you and He will take responsibility for your well-being.
How can you show yourself as worthy of God’s love? Only in one way-by exhibiting love for the sake of others. If God sees that you are self-centered in your love, He will leave; He will not be able to work with you. Then Satan will come in and the result will be destruction and confusion within you.
With true love for the sake of others, we can go over the Himalayan mountains. You can write the most beautiful literature while you are crossing those mountains; it will become the love literature for the sake of humanity. It will be the textbook of love and it will be most famous.
When I came to America in 1971, I knew I would face tremendous persecution and opposition, but I knew if that was the road to God’s love, I would not have any regrets. I knew that God would be with me and protect me, guiding me to the goal and that ultimately God’s victory would be secure. After North America, I will go on to South America and then Africa. If more persecution is awaiting me there, still I will go on. Even if I falter or drop dead at some point, I will never hesitate to go this road. You can write on my tombstone, “The man who dedicated himself to the fulfillment of the love of God faltered here with his dream unfulfilled.” But someone will come and pick up that dream and carry it on.
You husbands and wives should not dream of material things, thinking, “I need good clothes, a nice apartment, an automobile,” and so forth. Those things have only temporary value. You are clothed with the love of God, even though you may appear physically very dirty or dingy. That is the most dazzling crown of glory in God’s sight. This is what the ideal family is all about.
Mother and I are heading for Alaska now, which is like the “end-point” of America. I want to visit a certain couple I met who live out in the wilderness with only the bears as neighbors. I think I would like to live with bears for one year. However, I have a problem. If I tried to live out there, someone would find me and soon many people would want to come live with me! Then it would no longer be a wilderness!
During the salmon season, the commercial salmon fishers in Alaska are very busy. Many of them do not care anything about nature, about the community or about the Alaskan people but are only concerned with making money. I am determined that our people must have a different attitude. We must think about the people who live in Alaska, many of whom have no contact with the rest of the world.
We also have shrimp trawlers along the South American coast, employing many Korean fisherman. All the good captains there have been seeking to work for the Unification Church fishing boats. Why is that? It is because we do not fish for any selfish purpose or even for the sake of the Unification Church. Instead, we are doing it for the sake of the world, all of humanity. They know this and we treat them well.
Knowing this, would you try to stop me and Mother from going to Alaska? No, you would bless us. What if I asked you to go there too? Would you go? Would you say, “Let me think about that for a while. I will sleep on it.”? I need the kind of people who will say yes or no immediately.
First-class American citizens like yourselves are competing with each other to go into the lowest positions in the world in underdeveloped countries. In that way, the highest and lowest points come together, bringing balance. I would like to see American citizens going to the worst parts of the world, striving to take care of the children there and working harder than the parents of those children. Would you be willing to do that? Is that crazy thinking? No, that is not only smart thinking, it is especially smart. Ordinary wisdom would not come up with such a thing. The Moonies’ activities are always outside of the ordinary-especially smart.
If Mother and I had not gone to the World Media Conference in Colombia, it would have been an ordinary event. But because we were there, the participants had a special shine in their eyes and the atmosphere was very warm, even throughout the city. Although the media used to be completely negative toward me, now they are showing a lot of interest. The media thought that if they attacked me a few times, I would soon be incinerated and would disappear. But they have been hitting me for twenty years and Reverend Moon has only grown taller and stronger in the world! If I were to call them and give them tough, honest criticism, they would say, “Thank you, Reverend Moon.”
Do you think that Reverend Moon’s way of life has been right or wrong? The way in which I was received in Colombia was almost exactly like a head of state. When I landed at the airport, they did not put me through customs, immigration, and so forth. A limousine pulled up immediately to escort Mother and me, as soon as we disembarked.
The most important thing you must realize is that although Reverend Moon has no secular sovereignty, no nation, they still treated me like a head of state. Even if Reagan came there, they couldn’t have given him any better protection. They were not doing it out of a heavy sense of duty, either. The security people were truly honored to escort Reverend Moon. Mother and I were deeply touched by their sincerity. Think of how God must see that scene, thinking, “Even though my son doesn’t have a nation or any secular sovereignty, that nation is treating him in such a fashion. Bravo! Job well done!”
From the beginning point of the husband and wife, the family, we shall become the building blocks of the Kingdom of Heaven. Your husband might feel so much love for you that he would decide to pull out one hair every day in order to have something of yours to keep. If you turned out to be bald-headed, how would you feel? You would be a happy, bald-headed wife! You could call it a love head.
Eternity is our goal. I have been testing all these things I have spoken about on Mother, experimenting with our way of life. When I suggested them to her, Mother was flabbergasted and felt no desire to dissent. She had no room for complaint-it was a great strategy. Therefore, I am the happiest husband!
The happy couple is the beginning point and from there, we must have happy children, as the building blocks of the happy Heavenly Kingdom. Do you want to become candidates for the building blocks of the happy Kingdom of Heaven? God bless you!